Hey, Kids, That’s When Grandpa Vomited!


Wait, I don’t seem to understand, I said to him at 2am on our car ride from Los Angeles International Airport. JD picked me up from my trip to the Cayman Islands and let me know some terrible news. Wait, I don’t seem to understand, I repeated. He shook his head, remained quiet, and then I cried. Jasmine, I want to vomit. Right then, I knew we were in trouble.

So here’s the story: When we decided to launch EXPOSED Magazine, we outsourced our shipping fulfillment to a private company because we knew we were too busy to handle the shipment load. Basically, this company would package and ship each magazine, eliminating us from the process. While I was in the Caymans, JD received news that our shipper quit. Just like that. No warning, no foreshadowing, no shipping system in place to process the orders. For three days, JD stuffed, labeled, and shipped hundreds of magazines, but we were thousands behind.

Why didn’t you tell me?!? Not wanting to worry me while I was out of the country, JD kept this information to himself while he tried to create a new system. That’s when I cried again.

For three days, JD, Polo, and I stuffed magazines into envelopes, printed labels, bought two PC computers (who even does that?!) and tried to create a new system that didn’t require me to type each label ONE BY ONE (oh, yes, I did that…68 labels in four hours…can you say HOT MESS?!). The following Monday, when we went to the shipper’s to collect the magazines they had on-site, JD instructed me to stay in the car. Why?! Why should I stay seated when that guy totally screwed us and I need to give him a piece of my mind?! DOESN’T HE KNOW I’M LATINA AND WE GO CRAZY?!?

JD locked the doors as he walked away.

We struggled for a few days with our system (I even resorted to hand-writing labels, but quit when they looked straight ghetto), but finally found a system that worked. After much frustration, I’m thrilled to announce that every order until Wednesday, November 23, 2011 has been fulfilled, including international orders. All other orders will be processed today.

I can’t thank those who ordered EXPOSED Magazine enough for their time and patience. This adventure has been absolutely crazy (I should really write it as cray cray but I’m not rapper enough), but we made it out alive. Alight, alright…we’re making it out alive…but I think that’s part of the story. Part of our family folklore when I’ll one day sit around the fireplace and tell my grandkids about the time I had this cray cray idea that made their grandpa vomit.