Kisses and Disses : Cats and Twitter

Kisses and Disses : Cats and Twitter

Personal

I’m pretty sure it’s one of the worst things a friend could do. I mean, losing a friend’s pet ranks right on up there with Yo Mama jokes and boyfriend-stealing. It’s bad. So one could just imagine my horror when JD told me he couldn’t find Amy Wenzel’s cats.

It was 4:30am in Grand Rapids and the taxi awaited us downstairs. JD slipped out the front door to load the bags, but accidently left it open. When he came back to the room where I waiting, his eyes were bugging out of his face. Oh my GOD…I think the cats escaped!

Now, these aren’t just any cats. They are cats specifically saved from euthanasia by Amy–either adopted from the pound or rescued from the streets–and legitimate members of the Wenzel household. Pegasus and Other Kitty are black cats with emerald eyes, and could audition to be the model cat for Andrew Lloyd Weber’s Broadway musical, Cats. And they’re smart. Like, smart enough to play fetch, cup their paws in a glass of water to drink, and cajole anyone into cuddling. They’re basically glorified dogs with claws.

So just imagine my horror when JD says he lost Model Cats. In the middle of darkness, we’re desperately whispering Heeeeeere kitty kitty kitty…heeeeeeere… I mean, isn’t that how you do it in the movies?! Our main problem wasn’t that we couldn’t find the cats, we couldn’t even see them against the blackness of morning. I thought I might just cry, but then begged JD to just Do SOMETHING! There we were, running around a vintage house bribing two invisible creatures with treats, playing fetch, and a bedazzled crown of cat nip awaiting them upstairs. Pegasus finally made his way through the open door on his own and I nearly hugged him to death. JD and I then decided to strategically comb the length of the yard and make noise. Riiiiight. Because noise always catches cats, right? Well, the plan ended up working because we saw Other Kitty’s eyes under a nearby bush. We gently made noises and heeeered our way to guiding her back in the house.

The entire time our taxi driver laughed at us like we were insane. With the meter running.

When we were finally headed to the airport, we kinda laughed about the whole thing. Kinda. We felt like bad friends. In order to make things better, I decided to alleviate the situation by telling jokes. I turned to JD and said, Yo Mama is so…

It’s time for another installment of Kisses and Disses

This week’s DISSES go to…
*Smart cats. Though absolutely adorable, I almost lost my mind out of sheer fear. Even Andrew Lloyd Weber would have fired them!
*Junk Mail. I mean, really, does anyone even read it? My mailbox lately has been out of control and though a couple for horse feed or a 2% discount on laser hair removal sounds appealing, I think I’ll pass.
*Sheet sets. I want to buy just one, single ribbed sheet for my bed. I don’t need the extra flat sheet, the pillow cases, or the duvet cover…just the ribbed sheet. But, nooo, I need to buy everything. Why? I don’t know why, but if someone could please explain it, I may be less annoyed with this practice.

This week’s KISSES go to…
*Twitter. As strange as it sounds, I feel SO much closer to my friends. I know what they’re doing and the small things of their days. It’s like a really long phone conversation, without cords getting in the way. Well, you know…if you still OWN A PHONE WITH A CORD ON IT!
*Simply Orange Juice. I don’t know if I could get through a day without one glass of this stuff. It’s like I’m addicted. And it has calcium to boot, so I’m way healthy because I drink it. At least that’s what I tell JD.
*Anniversaries. JD and I will be celebrating our fourth anniversary on Monday, and we decided to start the partying a little early. Oh, world, just you wait and see how two people in love can shake a dancefloor and drop it like it’s hot. Or, if not that, then… Oh, world, just you wait and see how two people in love can order appetizers and watch a movie. Like it’s hot.

Leave a Comment

comments

Share to:

79

Comment with Facebook

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

  1. Jessica Pressley -

    Happy anniversary Jasmine and JD!!!!! God Bless!!!!!

      9.24.09 - 6:39 pm

  2. Yadira Laguerre -

    Happy Anniversary! Pierre and I will celebrate 4 years on Friday!! We’re going to see West Side Story on Broadway. Whose idea do you think that was? lol. Love that movie.

      9.24.09 - 6:43 pm

  3. whitney elizabeth -

    aww, congrats on the anniversary!!!!!! 🙂

      9.24.09 - 6:53 pm

  4. Raquel -

    still SOOOOOO glad you brought the K&D back….makes me just smile to read them! J*…you rock…even if you do lose cats!

      9.24.09 - 6:57 pm

  5. Kelly | Purple Lemon Designs -

    Kitties are a little smart for their own good, aren’t they?

    Happy Early Anniversary, J* and JD! I hope it is wonderful.

      9.24.09 - 6:59 pm

  6. B -

    Note to self: Never let Jas watch Juny or Polo.

      9.24.09 - 7:00 pm

  7. Mark Hayes -

    Kisses to the both of you for taking the extra effort to get those cats back where they belong. Not everybody would have done that, granted most people I like would, but still.

    Happy anniversary.

      9.24.09 - 7:00 pm

  8. Jenny Duffy -

    *YAY* To people who are in love!!! Love is the best!

      9.24.09 - 7:01 pm

  9. Jen -

    I have no idea who you are…no actually I do b/c I read your blog faithfully, but you make me laugh HARD. and out loud. not the token lol stuff that everyone says…but seriously laugh out loud. God has gifted you with telling stories..and I love them! 🙂

      9.24.09 - 7:02 pm

  10. Caroline Ghetes -

    I still have a corded phone. And I love Twitter too.

      9.24.09 - 7:02 pm

  11. Kristin Hoddenbach -

    You can buy just a fitted sheet at Target! I just did last week. 🙂

      9.24.09 - 7:03 pm

  12. Kat Braman -

    ooh i love Simply Lemonade so much! totally obsessed with it.

      9.24.09 - 7:03 pm

  13. Katie -

    Congratulations. My husband and I will be celebrating 7 years on Monday as well. Happy Anniversaries all around!

      9.24.09 - 7:03 pm

  14. Lola -

    I am feeling well down today. I was going to write you a letter. For some reason it makes me feel like someone listened to me. This post cheered me up a little. Way to go Jasmine!

      9.24.09 - 7:05 pm

  15. a little bit of whimsy photography -

    congrats on the anniversary… you two are just perfect for each other..

      9.24.09 - 7:06 pm

  16. Meg Sexton Photography -

    Happy Almost anniversary! My 4th is coming up soon too. It just gets better, doesn’t it?

    And yes, twitter is the best thing since sliced bread.

      9.24.09 - 7:07 pm

  17. Heike -

    Happy Anniversary!

      9.24.09 - 7:14 pm

  18. cassandra m -

    I vote for "anniversary WEEK"…that way you get 7 presents. LOL.

      9.24.09 - 7:16 pm

  19. Edward -

    Just don’t buy the expensive sheets from Restoration Hardware… YEESH! The ones with the super duper high thread-count wash like CRAP! Ay!

      9.24.09 - 7:18 pm

  20. andrea blair -

    diss …diss the sheet sets…I can’t even find a single King sheet in our small town!

      9.24.09 - 7:25 pm

  21. Danielle -

    I love that you dissed ‘smart cats’! That is hilarious. We have a cat, I guess a ‘smart cat’ and have sooooooo been there. I was laughing the whole time I read your post. Thanks for brightening up my thursday!

      9.24.09 - 7:29 pm

  22. Joanna -

    I own a phone with a cord…

      9.24.09 - 7:32 pm

  23. Gloria McCune -

    HAPPY 4th ANNIVERSARY to the cutest married couple in the universe!

      9.24.09 - 7:33 pm

  24. Katherine Bowman -

    Ha! Happy anniversary! 🙂

      9.24.09 - 7:33 pm

  25. Katherine Bowman -

    Oh, and the Simply Orange website is so cool! I really like the birds chirping! 🙂

      9.24.09 - 7:35 pm

  26. Amanda Patrice -

    Haha! You’re funny… thanks for always making me smile with your stories.

      9.24.09 - 7:37 pm

  27. Lydia -

    Yeah, losing a friend’s pet is even worse than accidentally running over your neighbor’s mailbox. I can just picture you and JD running around in the dark trying to coax them back inside!

      9.24.09 - 7:44 pm

  28. Brittany Davis -

    Love the cat story….and the name "Other kitty". Check out Ikea for sheets- they sell just the ribbed sheet and that’s why I love them.

      9.24.09 - 7:51 pm

  29. Tira J -

    You seriously had me on the floor laughing about the Model Cats. As a cat owner, my two kitties would have bolted out the door as well. So glad you found them. Junk Mail? I wanted to bundle the four grocery bags of junk mail from the past 4 months and give it back to the mail man. I mean really? I am sure he would have been so happy. Happy Thursday!

      9.24.09 - 7:59 pm

  30. JennP -

    I have a one-word solution for your sheet sets dilemma: IKEA!

      9.24.09 - 7:59 pm

  31. steve -

    I’m in love with Whole Foods Organic Orange Juice. Less acidic I think.

      9.24.09 - 8:00 pm

  32. OksanaJ. -

    So..I didn’t want to be the first one to make a comment on this post b/c I feel like that would put me on top of the blog stalker list.. and I don’t wanna be on top of any list that has stalker in it..i’m weird yes i know..but this was HILARIOUS!! I would totally freak out too if that happened to me.

      9.24.09 - 8:01 pm

  33. Leah Haydock -

    Love Twitter too – 140 words and I’ve updated my twitter, facebook and blog in one multitasking swoop! And I’m following you to try to get on one of your workshops 🙂

      9.24.09 - 8:04 pm

  34. {15:51} photography -

    My husband lost his friend’s dog while his friend was on his HONEYMOON! How’s that for adding insult to injury?!?!?!

    The mutt did eventually make his way home (the dog that is!!!) but my husband has yet to live it down!!

      9.24.09 - 8:05 pm

  35. Khristen -

    Happy Anniversary! I just so happen to own cats that must be related to Amy’s… no hard feelings 🙂

      9.24.09 - 8:15 pm

  36. Photo Ninja -

    congrats on the anniversary

      9.24.09 - 8:16 pm

  37. mella -

    order appetizers & watch a movie like its hot. love it. & you

      9.24.09 - 8:16 pm

  38. Chrystal -

    you know the kitties were probably laughing as much as the taxi driver watching you and mewling "getting colder" hee hee

      9.24.09 - 8:17 pm

  39. Marissa Rodriguez -

    Your cat story is hilarious!!! And I totally agree with you about the sheet sets by the way! 🙂

      9.24.09 - 8:31 pm

  40. Kristen -

    awesome! appetizers and a movie totally make for a hot anniversary night. enjoy 🙂

      9.24.09 - 8:35 pm

  41. jacquelinefigueroa -

    2 words for you, Pottery Barn. We got ’em. Happy Anniversary, it only gets better. xx

      9.24.09 - 8:45 pm

  42. Cristy Cross -

    Love how the Taxi driver didn’t get out to help and started the meter 🙂
    Just talked to my best friend today and she said you and JD recently joined their bible study group with Jamie. Super jealous you get to see her. Her name is Adrienne-I think you’ve met before. Give her a big hug when you see her next. She is one of the sweetest people alive.

      9.24.09 - 9:01 pm

  43. karen Ard -

    If you like the Simply OJ, you have to try their Limeade and the Raspberry Lemonade! To die for and yes we drink a whole bottle a day at our house, it’s that yummy!

      9.24.09 - 9:11 pm

  44. Raquel -

    Have a wonderful anniversary!

      9.24.09 - 9:12 pm

  45. Pol -

    Very glad you found those cats! At least you realised they were gone before you left 🙂

    Congratulations on the anniversary! Maybe there be many many more where you can smile and laugh and hold each other.

      9.24.09 - 9:15 pm

  46. Jamie Burnett -

    Ummm… Laser Hair removal is the cat’s meow… Sorry about the pun. Junk mail, not so much… Give it a try… You will be a changed woman! 😉

      9.24.09 - 9:37 pm

  47. MelissaF -

    Hysterical! Can’t wait to hear what you do for your anniversary. Congratulations to you and JD!!

      9.24.09 - 9:49 pm

  48. amanda thiessen -

    genious cats?! that is awesome

      9.24.09 - 10:26 pm

  49. Alexandra -

    Twitter love 🙂 🙂

      9.24.09 - 10:27 pm

  50. Joan Solitario -

    Have a happy anniversary Jasmine and JD! Can’t wait to see how two people in love celebrate ;o)

      9.24.09 - 11:25 pm

  51. Alyssa -

    I 3rd the Ikea comment. They have fitted sheets in just about every color. And you don’t have to buy the flats! 🙂

      9.24.09 - 11:42 pm

  52. brandi apodaca -

    Happy (early) anniversary you guys! my husband and I are celebrating our fifth anniversary today!!

      9.24.09 - 11:58 pm

  53. Amy Wenzel -

    When I come to see you I’m going to lose Polo in downtown LA. Personally, my cats thanked you for the adventure. It was the most exciting morning they’ve had in a long time besides staring at the back of my head at the computer.

      9.25.09 - 12:06 am

  54. Regina White -

    Wish you two a very blessed anniversary and many more.

    Kitty story is hilarious. I can almost see you guys running in the dark….Cute.

      9.25.09 - 12:29 am

  55. Noelle -

    I’m a recent convert to your blog and I just wanted to say Happy Anniversary on Monday! We have the same Anniversary! Keep up the amazing work so I can continue stalking!

      9.25.09 - 12:45 am

  56. Carme Whittaker -

    Wishing for God’s best in your life and JD’s this year and always! Happy 4th Anniversary.

      9.25.09 - 1:12 am

  57. Weddings on the Strand -

    Loved the kitty account. Such a natural writing style. Thanks.

      9.25.09 - 1:33 am

  58. AndreaK -

    Oh how I love kisses and disses!!
    I am always sure to have a smile on my face after I read these. Not to metion the out loud laughter that my family hears and strangely wonders about as I sit at the computer 🙂 I am with ya on the sheets! I am so over just the sets being sold. Have a happy love day!! You guys are just the cutest couple eva! So glad I got to meet you.

      9.25.09 - 1:41 am

  59. Aimee -

    Happy Anniversary to you both!!

      9.25.09 - 1:54 am

  60. Linda Sherrill -

    Happy Anniversary you two!
    And may you have many, many more!

      9.25.09 - 2:15 am

  61. Angel Canary -

    I so would have freaked out about the cats!!!! Congrats on the anniversary! My husband tells me he falls in love with me all over again and re-lives our wedding in every wedding we shoot. I think wedding photography helps keep people in that "new" love state, don’t you?

      9.25.09 - 3:56 am

  62. Katie Beverley -

    Oh my goodness, you are just so hilarious! Too cute, Jasmine Star, too cute!

      9.25.09 - 4:24 am

  63. Tira J -

    P.S….Sorry, I forgot to mention, Happy Anniversary! xoxo 🙂

      9.25.09 - 5:09 am

  64. Syreena B -

    watch it now….I still own a phone with a cord on it! She’s my comfort net when my celli and cordless are dead and my internet is down 🙂 it takes me back to the days when I used to get wrapped up in the cord chatting with my bff all night about what we were going to do in school the next morning…I *heart* cordless phones 🙂

      9.25.09 - 5:57 am

  65. Brian Fletcher -

    I love the Orange Juice too….but it’s so high in sugar I have forced myself to stay away from it…boo!! 🙁

      9.25.09 - 9:15 am

  66. Events by Evonne -

    You got married on my birthday! What a great day… congrats! 🙂

      9.25.09 - 12:05 pm

  67. Lerissa -

    Happy Anniversary!….and you’re hilarious and witty…as usual!

      9.25.09 - 12:13 pm

  68. Jackie Beale -

    lol, I have a similar cat story as well. You feel like you are just going to die when you loose someone else’s pets. Thankfully, the cats I was babysitting were found too 🙂 Such a funny story though, thanks for sharing.

      9.25.09 - 1:57 pm

  69. Rick Fernandez -

    You make me laugh……..a lot.

      9.25.09 - 2:34 pm

  70. Stephanie Stewart -

    HAPPY 4TH ANNIVERSARY!!!!
    Have a spectacular time!

      9.25.09 - 4:14 pm

  71. Alej Keigan -

    Funny story now & yes (as mommy to two smart cat-dogs) that would have been very tragic. My cats are always running out the door so I’m psycho lady when we have people over about telling them to close the door behind them when they go in & out.

      9.25.09 - 4:44 pm

  72. ohana photographers -

    lol to the phone with a cord on it….ahem..err..uh…we still have one in our kids room. just in case the power goes out she can make a call, plus she doesn’t have a cell phone. are we bad parents to make our kids work for cool stuff like that? possibly, but i digress. funny as usual j*
    have a fab weekend!

      9.25.09 - 5:52 pm

  73. Karen (Mikols) Bonar -

    Of course he left the meter running. Sheesh. I’m just impressed you got the cats back into the house!

      9.25.09 - 5:57 pm

  74. Otto Rascon -

    Happy early 4th anniversary!!! That is awesome. My wife and I will be celebrating 8 years in December. Time flies by when you are having fun!!!

      9.25.09 - 6:56 pm

  75. Amy Clifton -

    The cat story is hilarious. I once had to call my sweet dad to come over and crawl under my house to grab my crazy escapee cat. 🙂 Happy Anniversary!!

      9.25.09 - 11:07 pm

  76. Leyla N -

    OMG…I can’t even imagine losing a friend’s pet…I can totally see how you almost lost your mind..I would too!

    Happy early Anniversary!

    And I Love Twitter too, exactly for the same reasons you mentioned! It’s awesome! =)

      9.27.09 - 3:08 am

  77. Jo LeFlufy -

    This post made me howl. I once lost a friend’s dog (whom I adored as much as my own pooches) while we were hiking up in the forest behind my house. A herd of deer crossed our path and the dog was off like a rocket after them. I called him and searched for three hours before it got dark and I gave up…only to find him on my back porch when me and my dogs made it back to the house. Sneaky little fart.

      9.28.09 - 2:10 pm

  78. Margo -

    Have you tried Simply Orange with mango? I’m such a fan.

      9.28.09 - 7:31 pm

  79. Becky -

    You are always so much fun! I love how you can just open up to all your blog readers, but I bet you were always a good writer.

      10.8.09 - 6:43 am

Follow Jasmine on Instagram

@jasminestar