Kisses and Disses : Locks + Photographer’s Edit


You know that feeling when you realize you’ve done something really, really stupid? And then you laugh? Okay, well, I laugh. Which is probably the worst thing. Ever. It’s an awful trait I’ve picked up from my father and even though I try not to, I laugh when I make a mistake. Or do something stupid. Which is often.

A few days ago, I looked at the clock and realized I was late for a class at the gym and worried I’d lose my spot (here in the OC, the perils of losing one’s ‘spot’ at the gym is akin to missing a flight, so hold the hating). I grabbed my gym bag and darted downstairs to catch JD and Polo before they left on a morning walk. No luck. I walked outside to holler a goodbye, but they were nowhere to be found. I ran back inside, grabbed my stuff, and exited through the garage.

When I returned home later, I walked through the garage door into the kitchen and that’s when I heard it. Incessant doorbell ringing and rapid door-knocking. I froze in fear. I’m about to get robbed! Oh, yes, because in my world, robbers RING THE DOORBELL. Once I got enough courage to look through the peephole, I saw JD. Sweating bullets.

I opened the door and Polo collapsed at my feet, panting. JD walked passed me and muttered, You locked us out…. And that’s when it happened…the thing I hate the most. I laughed. Not in the haha that’s-funny kind of way, but in the haha I-can’t-believe-I-just-did-that-kind-of-way. But most people only ever hear my laugh as haha. And when you’re angry, that’s probably the last thing you want to hear.

I quickly apologized, but Polo and JD weren’t having it. That’s when I brought out the big guns. The words you save for big blunders such as this. It’s MY DAD’S FAULT! That’s right. In my world (where you lock your loved ones outside in the heat, and robbers ring the doorbell), blaming a parent for questionable personality traits is totally acceptable. And this leads me to this’s weeks Kisses+Disses

This week’s DISSES go to…
*Doors that lock. Obviously.
*Taxes. Could be just me, but if I had the power to move the decimal point just one spot to the left, life would be so much better.
*Me. For blaming dear old dad, for locking my boys out, and for laughing at inappropriate times.

This week’s KISSES go to…
*Rainbow sandals. I’ve had my Rainbows for well over nine years and though JD thinks it’s time for their retirement, I’m rooting for them. Best flip-flops ever.
*Photographer’s Edit. Oh, how I love Nathan and his team! I outsource my raw processing to Photographer’s Edit and they’re just a wonderful element to my workflow…and life! {If you’re interested in a 20% discount off your first order, use the jstar2010 code….holllllla!)
*Modern Family on ABC. I didn’t watch this show until a couple weeks ago. While stuck in bed with food poisoning, I browsed Hulu and came across Modern Family. This show is so hilarious and well written and just darn good. Big kiss to quality programming!

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  1. Ashley

    March 29th, 2010 at 3:21 pm

    I love Modern Family! Its the best to have on the laptop while working on photos! and has been a friend to me!

  2. jenifriend

    March 29th, 2010 at 3:36 pm

    modern family is the greatest thing ever and, no worries, i locked my dog out all day without knowing it too on friday. 🙂

  3. Jessica Riggle

    March 29th, 2010 at 3:42 pm


    Okay, so I am confused… You outsourse your images? For culling & editing and then get them back & do small touches? I have heard of this before but have been against it since I feel like that is part of what I am hired for… the editing. Can you control the amount of edits that they do? Since you mentioned it, I hate the idea less. But I am surprised. You mean you don’t spend hours upon hours attached to your computer with an umbilical cord, like I do??? Is this what everyone does?!?!OMG. Have I been missing something while I was under my Central Californian rock.


  4. Jessica Riggle

    March 29th, 2010 at 3:43 pm


    Okay, so I am confused… You outsourse your images? For culling & editing and then get them back & do small touches? I have heard of this before but have been against it since I feel like that is part of what I am hired for… the editing. Can you control the amount of edits that they do? Since you mentioned it, I hate the idea less. But I am surprised. You mean you don’t spend hours upon hours attached to your computer with an umbilical cord, like I do??? Is this what everyone does?!?!OMG. Have I been missing something while I was under my Central Californian rock.


  5. Jewelielyn

    March 29th, 2010 at 4:08 pm

    i’m sorry, but i am having some difficulty picturing jd muttering. sweeping you into his arms and saying, "you went to the gym? wow! you are awesome!"– now THAT i can picture! i guess we just think jd is romance novel hero material. and they never mutter. ever. so i’m sure you must have imagined the muttering 😉

  6. Christy

    March 29th, 2010 at 4:23 pm

    LOVE that show. I can’t help but talk like Gloria when its over.."ay, i sweard ju was yuss een da gadage weeth me, das why i lock ju outside da doord!"

  7. Emilie

    March 29th, 2010 at 4:33 pm

    HAHAHA! I locked my dad out today!!! See, I’m laughing too!!!! 😉

  8. Jessica Willis

    March 29th, 2010 at 4:37 pm

    I second the notion that Modern Family may be the funniest show on television. If you haven’t seen it, look up the episode with the "moon landing". It was absolutely hilarious. I was crying at one point. Also, a coworker locked herself out in the monsoon-VA-rain today with her 2 toddlers…keys? in the glove compartment. Hah!

  9. Lisa

    March 29th, 2010 at 4:41 pm

    Totally agree with taxes! I always think I should get more back then i do! I also laugh at the wrong moments, I think that I think it’s the only thing left to do!

  10. Jessica

    March 29th, 2010 at 4:42 pm

    Such a great post! I think my neighbors can hear me laughing at Modern Family. Although, I think I only laugh so loud because I am married to a Phil and I want Cameron to live next door.

  11. Jihan Cerda

    March 29th, 2010 at 5:03 pm

    This is sad, but I laughed when you discovered he was locked out. Oops! =)

  12. kim james

    March 29th, 2010 at 5:05 pm

    I am so in love with Modern Family. I can not decide which family I like better. Each character is perfect and the daughters, dead ringers for mine.

  13. Tammynize

    March 29th, 2010 at 5:06 pm

    if you love modern family, you’ll love cougartown!

  14. kortnee kate

    March 29th, 2010 at 5:10 pm

    hahahaha!! That is so funny! I have THE WORST time not laughing when I do something to Ted like that. Even with my 5 year old Micah! He looks at me and says, "It’s NOT FUNNY!" Which makes me laugh harder. Then I blame it on my Mom. 🙂

  15. Tina

    March 29th, 2010 at 5:15 pm

    Is it bad I laughed reading this?

  16. gladysjem

    March 29th, 2010 at 5:15 pm

    OMG. Oatmeal almost just came out of my nose because I LAUGHED so freakin hard. lol. TMI i know, but oh god Jasmine. YOU ARE THE FUNNIEST! Yes, JD…SHE’S HILARIOUS!

  17. Shannon

    March 29th, 2010 at 5:31 pm

    Oh boy. That sucks about locking your family out. Guess it could’ve been worse.

  18. Allison

    March 29th, 2010 at 5:46 pm

    Totally laughed out load reading this!

  19. Samantha Petrushak

    March 29th, 2010 at 5:46 pm

    J*–much too funny! And I LOVE Modern Family, great great show 🙂

  20. anda

    March 29th, 2010 at 5:48 pm

    while i was at the mall this morning looking for the perfect pair of black skinny dress pants that do not exist … i was thinking of your kisses & disses and wondering when the next installment would be. and here it is! one of my favorite features on your blog (after the FAQs, of course)! another great one, as usual!!

  21. ohana photographers

    March 29th, 2010 at 5:50 pm


  22. Katelyn James

    March 29th, 2010 at 5:51 pm

    Gotta love the rainbows! 🙂 I would have had my pair for 9 years but I LOSE them! It’s a terrible habit.

  23. Rebekah Elena

    March 29th, 2010 at 5:52 pm

    I laugh all the time when I make mistakes. Sadly, however, this trait is nowhere to be found in my family. Apparently I have the mutated recessive laugh at yourself gene. And none of our mailmen have had it and my mother is a respectable woman of decent nature so this reaffirms my suspicion of a peculiar genetic makeup.

  24. Damaris Mia

    March 29th, 2010 at 5:56 pm

    Hahahhaha omg. I do the SAME thing.. LAUGH. All my siblings and I (all 6 of us) do that. The other day my mom told me that brother fainted as he stood up for prayer while in Utah on a snowboarding trip… and I busted out laughing. Yeah, I know that sounds SO mean, but that’s how we are :/ hahaha. We don’t laugh to poke fun at the person.. we just see certain things funny… LOL

  25. Bea

    March 29th, 2010 at 5:57 pm

    Laughing happens to be my panic coping mechanism. Don’t know why, but when I’m nervous, it just happens! One time my family and I almost plunged to our death during the most horrific flight of our lives. And while the rest of the plane was crying, praying and saying their final goodbyes…I was laughing. Full on, cracking up. Talk about inappropriate. Thank God the turbulence was finally controlled and we lived. But let’s just say I got more than one dirty look during that deplaning. Oh, and a slap across my head from my sister who vows to never fly with me again. Eff!

  26. Anouschka

    March 29th, 2010 at 6:05 pm

    You are just too funny!! I always love your kisses and disses :))

  27. Leyla

    March 29th, 2010 at 6:15 pm

    You’re too hard on yourself, girl! It happens to the best of us.. and as for the laughing thing… I’m sure JD loves you exactly for this quirky and unique traits.. Keep smiling 😉

  28. Marissa Rodriguez

    March 29th, 2010 at 6:23 pm

    HAHA! Totally laughing out loud! This is hilarious!!! I felt really bad for JD and Polo while reading this but I couldn’t help but laugh!

  29. Catie Ronquillo

    March 29th, 2010 at 6:27 pm

    I couldn’t help but laugh (with you! not at you 😉 as I read your story. If anything, it makes for excellent story telling.
    And RAINBOW sandals rock! I was first introduced to them when I went to college in San Diego. I couldn’t believe I was about to spend $45 on sandals…and then I realized the quality of the investment. I love mine, and they’re the best when due for retirement. They are like a badge of awesomeness 🙂

  30. Jennifer Bacchiocchi

    March 29th, 2010 at 6:30 pm

    LOVE Modern Family! It’s hysterical. And btw, I laughed at my husband once when he showed up at our door soaked to the bone after walking a mile when his car broke down. He didn’t see the humor, either.

  31. Cindy

    March 29th, 2010 at 6:34 pm

    Hallelujah, sister! Another decimal point to the left for us all..!

  32. Brooke Snow

    March 29th, 2010 at 6:34 pm

    I got locked out a few weeks ago… only I had a crying hungry baby, no cell phone on me, and a husband holding the house key 20 miles away with no car since we were practicing our brilliant idea of "save the planet" and ride your bike for the week!

    Sometimes all you can really do is laugh anyway 🙂

    Glad you can find the humor!

    I think you’re awesome!

  33. Rachel

    March 29th, 2010 at 6:58 pm

    PLEASE do a faq on outsourcing images! What exactly does Photographer’s Edit do? Do you have them simply correct exposures and stuff like that and do any extra touches yourself? Or are the images they send back the final ones you use for your prints and books? I’m just so astounded by the concept, I want to know every detail! 🙂

  34. Leah

    March 29th, 2010 at 7:14 pm

    I have the same problem. I also laugh when I am nervous, that did not work in my favor when I was in basic training. Drill Sergeants tend to get a little angry when you start laughing at them.

  35. Jennifer

    March 29th, 2010 at 7:20 pm

    Modern Family = One of the funniest shows ever written for TV. Hands down. It’s not rare that actual snorts –and tears– come out while laughing to that show!

  36. Brianna Dowdy

    March 29th, 2010 at 7:30 pm

    Ahhh how I love my Rainbows. I was lucky enough to grow up in San Clemente which boasted a great Rainbow outlet.

  37. jacquelinefigueroa

    March 29th, 2010 at 7:55 pm

    YES!! Cheers to Rainbow Sandals & Modern Family! No cheers to locking people out 🙂

  38. Stephanie Stewart

    March 29th, 2010 at 8:08 pm

    I heard that Modern Family is an awesome show, gotta check it out, thanks! And poor JD and Polo!!! 😉

  39. Ashley

    March 29th, 2010 at 8:19 pm

    OMG! I was just laughing hysterically in my office! Thanks for making my Monday! As for Modern Family this past weeks epsiode was so good I was laughing, no correction I was WEEZING I was laughing so hard! Hysterical!!
    PS: Just as a side note – I live in Philly and recently robbers were ringing doorbells with empty Pizza Boxes!! So you aren’t that far off!!

  40. Morgan

    March 29th, 2010 at 8:21 pm

    Too funny! I got locked out of my boyfriend’s house once. Only it was 30 something degrees and raining. He was in the shower and I ran out to get something in my car, with no coat on, no cell phone, no nothing. Yeah, not fun.

    And I totally agree, Rainbow Flipflops rule! Worth every penny, as they are the only shoe I wear when it’s warm.

  41. Angel Canary

    March 29th, 2010 at 8:29 pm

    Hahhaha, I mean, that really sucks! Seriously, I have the same bad habit, Steven could tell you alllll about how I laugh when I’m nervous, scared or screw up. You are, after all, only human – super human, but human. 😉

  42. lisa

    March 29th, 2010 at 8:44 pm

    Thanks for the laugh. I needed one today.

  43. Eileen Whitmore

    March 29th, 2010 at 8:48 pm

    Wow! I love it! The more I read about you, the more I realize we have similar personalities and react to situations the same way, only, I’m probably more of a cheeseball! LOL! (It was torrential downpour and sleeting on my way home from work – now the sun is out! I love it when the wind pushes the clouds away really fast!

  44. Karen

    March 29th, 2010 at 9:10 pm

    Lol, poor JD and Polo. I practically live in my Rainbows…sometimes even when it’s raining.

  45. Mike Reed

    March 29th, 2010 at 9:38 pm

    Too funny, my wife locks me out ALL THE TIME so now I walk around the house with keys in my pocket, I could be in my PJ’s and I’ll have my keys! Outsourcing my RAW files scares me! I’m such a control freak when it comes to my images but thanks for the heads up, I’m back to back to back weddings May through late June so you never know…

  46. amanda

    March 29th, 2010 at 10:20 pm

    Oooh, I hear ya on Modern Family! I got into it a couple weeks ago. I don’t normally have time for much tv, so if I’m gonna watch it then it better be good! 🙂

  47. louise

    March 29th, 2010 at 11:14 pm

    Hey J*!
    Thanks again for sharing a good laugh. I am too wondering about the Photogaphers Edit tell us more!! I kinda like that idea.. and would love you to explain what and how, Cheers 🙂
    Hey also to the lady Bea futher up this list your story of on the plane is SOOO funny, still cracking me up!

  48. s h e r r y

    March 29th, 2010 at 11:31 pm

    Haha. Aww, poor JD and Polo! But yes, Rainbows = <3 . (We don’t have them in Canada!)

  49. Patti

    March 30th, 2010 at 1:07 am

    Oh Boy, I am so glad that someone else laughs in less than funny situations. I am shocked that Brent has not posted his take on my laughter issue yet. I used to laugh at my dad when he would give me trouble when I was young, I laughed when Brent pulled his arm out of the socket starting the motor boat and I laughed just the other week when Brent and I were giving our daughter trouble for not focusing on her school work…. okay not cool, but it is my dad’s fault. (Did I forget to say thank you for giving me the perfect excuse for my uncool laughing problem?) LOL

  50. Daniel Lanning

    March 30th, 2010 at 1:13 am

    i laugh in those situations, too. and your story got me a good laugh tonight (at JD and Polo’s expense). loved how you said Polo collapsed at your feet…i could just see our maltese doing that same thing. have a great night!

  51. jean smith

    March 30th, 2010 at 2:24 am

    "I froze in fear. I’m about to get robbed! Oh, yes, because in my world, robbers RING THE DOORBELL."


  52. Jill

    March 30th, 2010 at 2:37 am

    you are so funny, i love it! My sister and I were always mortified when we heard bad news and just started grinning or even worse, laughing! Good to know that there are more of us out there!

  53. feuza

    March 30th, 2010 at 3:21 am

    Glad you are feeling better and I too have laughed inappropriately and nervously

  54. allyson magda

    March 30th, 2010 at 3:35 am

    your fellow rainbow fan to the end…you do know there is an outlet in San Clemente? Love your kisses and disses segments, always very fun!

  55. Beria Charles

    March 30th, 2010 at 4:35 am

    lol… "While stuck in bed with food poisoning…" is the best part of the whole post! Guess where I am right now??? Doing what???… okay Jazz… you win! I made into next week’s DISS list!

  56. Samantha Morris

    March 30th, 2010 at 4:50 am

    I am with Jessica and Rachel… I feel out of the loop on workflow… have you done a FAQ on this???

  57. Susan

    March 30th, 2010 at 5:29 am

    Two things I’m in shock about . . . first, pulled up the link to Rainbow Sandals expecting something totally fabulous and although I am sure they are super fabulous . . . SO not what I was expecting to see. Then I was in shock that you outsource your raw processing . . . really??? Do tell cuz I can’t imagine!

  58. -brittany-

    March 30th, 2010 at 5:36 am

    Great K&D! Love Modern Family and Photographer’s Edit. Several people mentioned they were scared to outsource this part of there biz…check out photographer’s edit’s website…you can do a free test run with them which eliminates any worry you might have.

  59. christina

    March 30th, 2010 at 7:49 am

    that is so so something i would do! haha!

  60. SqueakDog Pet Photography

    March 30th, 2010 at 12:09 pm

    I LOVE Modern Family! I Tivo it and watch it while on the treadmill. Takes my mind off of the pain of working out 🙂

  61. joyful weddings and events

    March 30th, 2010 at 5:41 pm

    my hubby has had his rainbows for over 5 years and they are held together by duct tape. He refuses to get new ones because he will have to wear them in 🙂

  62. amanda thiessen

    March 30th, 2010 at 6:44 pm

    you should watch parenthood! love that show – so good!! that would definitely be on my kisses list 🙂

  63. shannon h.

    March 30th, 2010 at 7:11 pm

    oh, poor jd and polo! haha!! i mean no haha!
    and LOVE modern family! it’s fab!

  64. Christine

    March 30th, 2010 at 7:18 pm

    I laugh when I do something wrong/stupid too! I mean, what else is there to do but laugh? 🙂 Those sandals look really comfy btw. I’d be rooting for them too!

  65. candace m

    March 31st, 2010 at 12:46 am

    don’t feel bad! i laugh when i am stressed, so i unfortunately laughed through my entire wedding (we did everything ourselves, it was stresssssss-ful)…approx 80% of the people at our wedding thought i was a complete tool. thank goodness my husband thought it was funny…and loves me anyway!

  66. Stephanie Reinish Photography

    March 31st, 2010 at 1:21 am

    Modern Family is one of the funniest shows on TV right now… its amazing! Do you watch How I met your Mother or Big Bang? Also hysterical

  67. Dawn McCarthy

    March 31st, 2010 at 3:52 am

    I admit it…I totally laughed out loud when I read this and I get it. My husband woke up delirious the other night (I was just turning in for the night) and he proceeded to walk right into the bathroom door hitting his head really hard. Really hard. I laughed. Out loud. Loud. I did tell him that I was so sorry that happened but had the shoe been on the other foot he would have laughed too.

  68. Julie Massie

    March 31st, 2010 at 4:31 am

    I TOTALLY know where you’re coming from. I laugh when people fall down or hurt themselves…it’s totally just nervous laughter, but it’s so completely inappropriate when Hubs’ 85 year old grandmother slips on wet pavement, and I crack up. Gesh…

  69. Jessica Moores

    March 31st, 2010 at 5:24 am

    J* this is sooo funny bc we’ve all done it. The locking loved ones out part, not the laughing part. 😉 So, my super handy hubby installed this nifty key pad on our front door while I was at WPPI (isn’t that sweet) Anyway, you can push your code and poof, the door unlocks. It was like $125 at Home Depot, and if my hubby can install it, so can JD! THE END!

  70. Evonne Wong

    March 31st, 2010 at 12:53 pm

    Oh no, poor JD and Polo! I think next time, Polo needs to remind daddy to bring his keys in case mommy is not home! 🙂

  71. Little d

    March 31st, 2010 at 4:52 pm

    I love Modern Family! "Why the face?"

  72. J'Lynn

    April 1st, 2010 at 4:52 am

    Haha poor JD and Polo. I too suffer from the laughing at totally inappropriate moments syndrome(yes I think it is a syndrome ;). I am horrible about it especially if someone falls or better yet if I do. Just can’t help it!

  73. Pye

    April 2nd, 2010 at 9:21 am

    hahaha, Jasmine, I love your stories. You are awesome. "robbers ring the doorbell" … you crack me up.

  74. michelle sidles

    April 2nd, 2010 at 9:47 pm

    Yes! Kisses to Modern Family. I discovered it late through HULU too. Nice to know I’m not the only one watching TV on my puter. 😉

  75. Apple

    April 5th, 2010 at 3:48 pm


    wait. photographer’s edit for raw images? but i thought you edited your own photos?

  76. Ginger Moseley

    April 5th, 2010 at 7:48 pm

    Nervous laughers UNITE! hehehe Right there with you. Love how you told the story.

    Just thinking about getting back into outsourcing since the season is really ramping up. 😀 Good to hear you love PE. Take care!

  77. Michelle Parish

    April 11th, 2010 at 2:21 pm

    Hi Jasmine! I DO THE SAME EXACT THING WHEN I’VE SCREWED UP! Can I blame your dad too?? ~LOL~

  78. Bunn Salarzon

    April 14th, 2010 at 7:37 pm

    I just did my 15 trial images with Photographer’s Edit … I have a question in regard to your own workflow, is Photographer’s Edit only doing the standard RAW color correction then you do the custom editing in Photoshop using TRA and/or Kevin Kubota Actions? I thought PE does the whole shebang, but it doesn’t appear so. I was hoping to outsource for the whole nine yards.

  79. Tracy

    February 24th, 2011 at 8:03 pm

    This post made me laugh out loud, I couldn’t help it! Oh, and we love Modern Family!

  80. Marc Hunter

    October 19th, 2012 at 5:58 pm

    Photographer’s Edit is tha Bomb!!

  81. Donal Doherty

    July 13th, 2013 at 6:35 am

    Hi Jasmine, I outsource to Photographers Edit too (on your recommendation). Do you get them to put some in B&W or get them all back in colour?