Kisses+Disses : Garbage Men + Barometers

Personal

I ran up and down the stairs this morning. Huffing and puffing. It was a workout. That’s how much I was running. I asked him where the picture was. JD had no idea what I was talking about. I sigh. The picture of OUR DAUGHTER!! He still had no idea what I was talking about.

Back up a sec…
Last week we went to Dave&Buster’s. On a Friday night. Which is akin to, say, Friday night at Walmart in the Midwest. A bunch of people walking around trying to kill time and waste money. With adult beverages. And yes this happens at Walmart too…I saw a documentary about Walmart once. Except Midwesterners take their own coolers and hide them in their Camaros. So, yes, Dave&Buster’s. At the end of the night, JD and I sat in a game machine that took pictures of our faces and then produced a picture of what our future daughter would look like. Let’s just say when I saw the picture, I was visibly shaken. Reason #4,982 to explain to my mother-in-law why I don’t have a child. Internet, it was scary.

This morning…
I thought it would be funny to blog the picture of our future daughter. You know, so I could scare you too. But I couldn’t find the picture. Then I ran up and down the stairs and sighed. And that’s when it hit me: JD threw the picture away. HE THREW AWAY A PICTURE OF OUR FIRST CHILD. How can I be married to such a man?! Who would do that?!

Internet, JD scarred me today. And I’m still trying to forgive him. Which leads to another installment of Kisses and Disses

This week’s DISSES go to:
*Husbands who throw away pictures of their first pretend child.
*AT&T. Whenever I hear these three letters, I can’t help but twitch and raise an angry iPhone.
*Walmart. Any place you can buy a lamp, garden hose, and a ham at the same time scares me.

This week’s KISSES go to:
* 🙂 . Yes, a big kiss to smiley faces in emails. Those two symbols together can change the entire tone of a sentence…love it.
*Antique stores. I bought a barometer (with cracked glass) last week for $21 for a new cabinet. Go ahead. Be jealous.
*Pickles. A dill pickle next to a sandwich makes the world a better place.
**And a bonus kiss to Tanya at Photographer’s Edit for always giving great customer service and taking such good care of me!