They Throw Rocks at Things That Shine

Dear Jasmine,
I feel so stupid writing this email. Who am I to whine and complain. And yet here I am in tears over what others say of me. I am desperate to fight. To stand. Against all the negativity to stay the course and walk my own path. Even when nastiness is thrown and the mud gets so thick your clients notice it.

All that to say, I have a new photographer in the tiny town I do business in (population 5,000). I feel that she has placed a target on my business and throws mud and begins rumors to the point that a long standing client talked to me about it today. I know I shouldn't let what others say make me want to quit but honestly Jasmine, I do want to quit. Life is for more than this and I'm tired of the nastiness in our industry. How do I deal? How do I move forward while holding my head up when all my head wants to do is bury itself heavy in my bed sheets?

Sincerely,
Tumbling Down in Tiny Town

Dear Tumbling Down,
I debated publicly responding to your letter. It would have been easier to simply reply from under the protection of my own heavy bed sheets, but I decided to write my feelings in the open because you're not alone. I'm not alone. We're not alone. And before you think I'm going to talk about our industry's nastiness, I'm not.

If I highlighted the nasty, we'd perpetuate more nasty. Where we place our focus is what will come our way. In light of this, let's ignore those who seek to destroy our dreams and focus on how we can find light, beauty, and fearlessness in the midst of turmoil.

What you need to know is the following: some people just won't like you. And some people won't like me. They'll spend hours plotting to dismantle your name and shake the love you have for what you do. What I've come to discover is that these people are unhappy, disillusioned, and frustrated with their current state so they want to hurt others they way they themselves are hurting.

If you view hate mongers as broken people who are alone, it'll allow you to readjust your focus. No longer should you allow their words hurt you because you know it comes from desperation for wanting what you have, for what you are doing. The higher you hold your head, the smoother you dance to the beat of your own drum, the brighter you smile, the less they hurt you.

Tumbling Down, keep doing what you're doing. Continue to follow the path you're destined to forge and remember what my friend Taylor Swift says, People throw rocks at things that shine.

Stay Fabulous,
j*

p.s. Taylor and I aren't friends, but I sometimes pretend we are.