Kisses and Disses : Acupuncture + Ezekiel Bread


It just got to a point where I walked around like I was auditioning for a remake of The Golden Girls. You know, the one where they invite their Latina neighbor to come live with them. I walked around with my hand to my lower back and my face scrunched like I was very focussed on the next step. Slowwwwwly. Painfully. Where’s Rose when you need her?!

My mother in law, upon hearing of my back aches, suggested I try acupuncture. This is also the same lady who harbors Chinese herbs in her cabinet like China was disappearing. Forever. And guess what? I MARRIED HER SON. Who also collects said herbs. Please don’t get him started on ginger root. Where was I? Oh, yes. Acupuncture. So my mother in law suggests her acupuncturist and JD sets up an appointment.

There I am laying on my stomach with, oh, like a thousand needles in my back and I think to myself, Why didn’t I just rub the ginger root on my back like JD suggested?! Then…then! Then the acupuncturist–who doesn’t speak english very well but whispers soothingly–hooks the needle to a stimulation machine. You know, the one that jolts your muscles with ELECTRIC CURRENT.

I get home and tell JD of the ordeal. Then he apologizes because he sent me to the wrong acupuncturist. The one his mother never suggested. So this is the part of the Golden Girls episode where Blanche and Rose sit in the kitchen, toast with a cup of coffee, and the laughing track fills the air. Except in my life we sit in the kitchen and toast with ginger root tea.

And this brings me to another installment of Kisses and Disses

This week’s DISSES go to…
*Acupuncture, at least of the stimulation variation.
*The Phoenix Suns. They’re kinda slowing down the pace for the Lakers to win the NBA Finals. Let’s get it together, boys.
*Pictureless frames. Yes. Yes, I have frames in my house without pictures in them. HUNG ON THE WALL. Please don’t get me started.

This week’s KISSES go to…
*Acupuncture. I found a new acupuncturist and so far he’s been great. I’m still debating if it’s a good fit for me, but I’m willing to try.
*My mother in law. I love her Chinese heritage, but I love more that she’s passed her best qualities to her son.
*Ezekiel Raisin Bread. This organic, sprouted grain bread is delicious and a healthy breakfast option…and doesn’t taste like cardboard.Happy Monday!